Return tickets

Return tickets

I was thinking, as I purchased a return ticket from Leeds to Sheffield, that I don’t really grasp the concept of return tickets. A return ticket is, as you probably know, a ticket that brings you back to your origin from your destination for (sometimes significantly) less than the cost of two one-way tickets. In the case of National Rail, the cost of a return ticket is barely more than the cost of a one-way ticket. Or, if you look at it another way, you almost have to pay for your journey home even if you don’t intend to take it. Even more bizarrely, the concept of a “day return” means you are penalized for not returning on the day you left. The return ticket phenomenon means that people are strongly discouraged from making journeys that...

69 Love Songs and the working day

69 Love Songs and the working day

As an extravert1 I find myself in situations at work where interactions with others dominate my day. Whether it’s meetings, asking people questions, answering other people’s questions or simply reading and sending emails, there’s always some interaction going on. I really love that aspect of my job, which means it’s somewhat frustrating during those times when I have to sit down by myself and work alone, which do happen quite regularly. When I have to work alone, I find that listening to music, especially music I know well, allows me to concentrate by providing a backdrop that goes some way towards replacing the interaction that drives me. And this is where 69 Love Songs comes in. The 1999 classic by Stephen Merritt, aka The Magnetic...

Too many stairs

Too many stairs

Here’s a question that I’ve been meaning to ask my readers: How many flights of stairs is too many stairs? In my last building I lived on the fourth floor1 and I always tried to take the stairs as much as possible but would go up in the lift if I had heavy bags or I was sufficiently tired and/or drunk. Now I live on the third floor I am much more inclined to climb them even if I’m tired. I think five, or maybe six, would be the limit at which point the lift would win except when I’m feeling extra-healthy. Let’s take a quick straw poll. Are any of my readers conscious of their stair-climbing limits? Please share them in the comments!2 In Europe this means four floors above the ground floor. [↩]Twitterers: Please may I request...

Now wash your hands

We were all taught way back in primary school that after using the lavatory, we should wash our hands. This is not a matter of personal hygiene, it’s a matter of the hygiene of everyone who has used that particular toilet and with whom you have shared germs. Remember, a lot of nasty illnesses are accompanied by irregular bowel movements, so it stands to reason that shared toilets are going to be covered in nasties. Now, with that in mind, why is it that whatever shared toilet facilities I find myself in, whether in a dingy bar, a posh restaurant or even an office building, it seems to be fewer than 50% of men that actually wash their hands before leaving the room and spreading whatever they’ve caught to everything and everyone they touch? Is this a...

British superheroes

I recently finished The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes (a volume comprising the first 13 short stories) and it occurred to me that Holmes is very much an early superhero. He has immense powers of deduction and disguise, often baffling even the best police detectives (whom he frequently refers to as ‘imbeciles’) and uses those powers only to further the common good and not for his own personal profit. He also shows another superhero trait, that of recognizing the value of all human beings, even wrongdoers, often finding a way to secure their escape rather than face the corrupt justice system. But Holmes makes a big deal out of his powers being no more than any person could do with the right application of brainpower. He and Watson frequently point out...

Verbal after-images

As a former denizen of Manchester, it gave me a warm memory, on returning to that metropolis the other day, to hear the familiar sound: Caution! Bollards in motion! It got me thinking, though. Ten months away from Manchester and that phrase — not just its words but its tempo, pitch and timbre — is still etched into my brain. In the era of recorded sound, specific repeated recorded phrases can become mnemonic cues, much like specific street scenes or smells.1 How many of these are cues for you? Stand clear of the closing doors. Unexpected item in bagging area! Would Inspector Sands please come to the communication room? Kids and grown-ups love it so; the happy world of Haribo. First TransPennine Express apologises for the late running of this service, and for the...